What a Difference a Year Makes

It was a year ago this week that moving to Denver became first a possibility then a reality.  Within the span of five working days I had been presented with the opportunity, talked it over with G and expressed my interest, and then was officially given the promotion.

Just like that.

During that week, during the chaotic work days, G and I emailed back and forth continually:  Can we do this?  Should we do this?  We have to do this.  We're going to do this!  Wait - are we really going to do this?!

A year ago

The thing about blogging - or at least the way I blog - is that I present you with the acceptable and public version of my life and thoughts.  And that version in the past year has been I love Denver!  Denver is the best!  Living here rocks!  And that's the truth.  I have lived in places (um, Hawaii) that are far more exotic than here but I have to tell you, if I have any control over it, I'm here to stay people.

This is my city.  This is my tribe.  I have found my place and I'm so not taking it for granted.

We close on the new house next week.  We will move (ugh) again, for reals this time, for good this time.

Getting to know touristy 16th Street

What I don't blog about are the troubles and the drama and the chaos and dealing with levels of sadness and anxiety, and fear of the future, and losing Orca and being stuck with quite possibly the cutest bunny ever who refuses to even acknowledge us on any level.

I say this not to be a buzzkill but because I spent years of my life going through bad struggles, consuming struggles, while reading blogs about peoples' fantastic lives.  And it occurs to me (not that I'm fantastic!) that a lot of times I can come across like that, simply because it's the one dimension (of many!) that I put forward here.  The good stuff is the neutral stuff, the (mostly) impersonal stuff.  The diplomatic stuff.  The safe stuff.

So this is what they mean by "desert climate"...

I don't believe that happiness is everything and I don't believe that we have complete control over our lives.  Free will?  Yes.  Freedom of choice and ability to make the wisest decisions given our parameters?  Yes.  But blowing a wish out into the universe and then thinking positive thoughts about it and making it come true?  Not so much.

But for about two years or so before moving here, I knew, I just knew that I couldn't stay in Virginia.  At that point in my life I had spent about a decade living in places where I just could not seem to fit or belong, and I reached a new low point.  It was a lot more than location, but location played a part.  I always knew that if I picked up and moved somewhere else, my problems would find me, and I would have to deal with them in a great place just like I would in a not-so-great-place.  And that's true, so I worked and worked on solving some of those issues.

The truth is, though, that fitting into your location can contribute a lot to your quality of life.  And to your happiness and stress level and general well-being.  It's true.  Which is why I often say if worse comes to worse and I have to wait tables to stay here, I will.  I will be a poor college student (hopefully! coughGREcough) and I will hike on the weekends and I.  Will.  Love.  It.

The point of this post?  No idea.  :)  I didn't mean to smack you upside the head with some crazy seriousness.  Just wanted to clue you in that our lives are more complex than hiking on the weekends.

Those hikes though?  Pretty damn cool.

That is all.