The little wagon that could

When G was out here last week, we had a to-do list that was a mile long.  And on it, he had put "buy wagon."  He thought it would be a good tool for schlepping groceries and stuff back and forth from the apartment to the car.  I wasn't too keen on the idea, but like the stellar and godly wife that I am, I kept my mouth shut.  And I'm glad I did because he is a total genius.

Let me present to you the best idea ever:

It's the little wagon that could - and does! - carry all my crap.  I made my first grocery run yesterday and this puppy really came in handy.  I got a couple of weird looks in the elevator, but ask me if I care.

**Also I feel the need to say that we actually use those cloth, re-usable grocery bags.  Which of course were buried under boxes in the apartment and were not in my car where they usually reside.  Just sayin.

The trip to the grocery store was harrowing yesterday and I learned my lesson which is:  If you need to take your time and learn where everything is, then don't come on a Saturday morning, you complete moron.

The store closest to us is great, but small, and I was wondering around, wide-eyed, open-mouthed, trying to read the signs for each aisle, as exasperated patrons were rushing past me on both sides.  CO peeps are extremely nice, so I take the blame for this one.  I know they probably wanted to throttle me with their baguettes.

I have reconnected with a friend from my first years of college who lives close by.  I am going over to her house for dinner tonight and I have wracked my brain trying to recollect the last time I saw her.  I think I was maybe 22?  At the latest, I would have been 23.  CRAZY!  I am really looking forward to it.  We chatted on the phone earlier this week and spent the entire time basically squealing in excitement.  Indeed, it was like college all over again.  Fun times.

TGIF, people!

Look what came out today

J.K. Rowling's first book for adults.

I have high, high hopes.

Observations

As I write this, I'm sipping on a Pumpkin Spice coffee, available in K-cup (!).  I would like to point out that I made it myself, in my own coffee maker, and am drinking it out of my own mug.  It has been a long time coming, people.

Also?  I'm sitting on my own furniture!  In my own living room!

We are surrounded by a sea of cardboard, but it's coming together.  Slowly but surely.  Here are some observations thus far of life in the Mile High City.

*Nine times out of ten, when we tell people we are moving/have moved to the Denver area, they say one of two things.  (1) "Oh, I love the Denver airport!" or (2) "Do you know they have medical marijuana there?"

*What 300+ days of sunshine per year?  It has rained almost every day we've been here.  False advertising.

*Everywhere we go, there are independent bookstores, coffee shops, row after row of pubs and little restaurants.  I'm in Heaven and will never leave.

*Apartment living is turning out to be an easier adjustment than I expected.  This was most likely helped by living with the in-laws for a few weeks.  I'm just sayin.  Although the overall living area is smaller, it turns out that each room, or each "mini area" actually feels larger than it did in our house (except the kitchen).  So, any given room feels spacious and complete; I never feel like I've "downgraded" to an apartment.

*I think this is helped by the type of apartment complex this is.  They call it "luxury style apartment homes" in an attempt to market it, but I have to say that little details make a big difference.  We can pick paint colors for accent walls, and the normal walls aren't an industrial white; they are a warm beige with white molding accents.  We have two balconies that are big enough for our deck furniture and bikes, and the wagon we bought (yes, you read that right) to cart our groceries up from the car to the apartment, via the elevator.  It has come to this, people.  We are also considering carting Orca around in it when she gets here.

*The appliances are modern (black) and the countertops are faux granite.  A little detail goes a long way to make it feel more homey and less temporary.

*We have been to Wal Mart four times in the last three days.  I'm not the biggest fan of that store, but as G puts it, where else can you find groceries, washer fluid, shower curtains and modems all in the same place?

*Although I'm convinced that this move has strained our marriage to the limit, it has not been without humor.  I have found myself saying things like, "Ok, G, after you unpack those boxes, don't forget to set up the router and get the oil changed in my car.  And then you will need to search through all the boxes and find the TV cords.  I can't remember what box they're in, so just look through them all.  I'm going to put up the fall decorations.  Oooh!  I forgot all about this porcelain pumpkin!"

Want to come over and help us unpack?  I'll give you some Pumpkin Spice coffee!

The beginnings of home

We're here!

Hello to our awesome CO neighbors!

I woke up this morning with a bloody nose, so it's official.  I have to go through this process all over again.

Also, we keep inhaling but there is no oxygen.  Can someone do something about that?

I woke up bright and early at 5:00 this morning and we can't check in to our apartment until 10:00, so, hello peeps!  Also, I'm very hungry!  And thirsty.

Plans for today include getting keys to the apartment and unloading my Beverly Hillbillies car.  Then we have brunch at 11:30 with C, my main work peep who has been waiting for me to get out here.  C introduced me to The Good Wife, Mad Men and Vampire Diaries - therefore, she is a very important person in my life.  I consider her my main line to all things pop culture.

After the mimosas, the manual labor begins.  We are going to buy 500,000 shelves to put up in every nook and cranny of the apartment in order to help us adjust to what happens when you downsize from three floors to three rooms.  Organization!  We are going to be clean and we are going to be organized!  Even if it kills us - and it just might.

They deliver the furniture tomorrow and I have this sinking feeling that it is not all going to fit.  We may be able to walk across the entire apartment on furniture itself, like lily pads in a pond.  No need to even use the floor.  But we will cross that bridge when we come to it.

I am so happy to be here and so happy that G took the time off work to make the hellish drive with me and to help get things semi-situated before going back to work.  He leaves in a couple of days to go back and continue the job search.

I am going to miss him and the bun bun.

I am not going to dwell on that, though.  That comes later.  First, we have to survive the last of the manual labor.  Wish us luck!

Missouri Loves Company

Hello from the road.  The first day, we drove to Lexington, Kentucky for the night.  Yesterday, we drove through more of Kentucky, then some of Indiana and Illinois, then a boatload of Missouri before entering (finally, finally) Kansas.

I'm writing this from Topeka, as we gear up for breakfast and one.more.day of driving. 

The view from the only back door of my car that we can open.

The other night we had dinner at Cracker Barrel (is there any other place to eat on a road trip?) and G bit into a biscuit.  He goes, "This is a d@mn fluffy biscuit."  He then elaborated, "I mean it.  See?  I can press down on it but it just bounces back into its former shape.  Very, very fluffy."  That, (and one Sonic lunch), was a highlight, my friends.  It's like the only semi-interesting thing I have to include in this post.

Taking Orca to be boarded at the vet.  She has been there so much lately, she's practically a regular.  We walk in and about three techs appear out of nowhere going, "Well hello, Orca!!!!"

We made one slight detour in the beginning of the trip (a million years ago) to see Betsy, the lady who owns the B&B that we love so much.  We showed her Africa pictures and she told us about her recent Alaskan cruise.  It was nice to get a chance to chat with her before the move.

And she surprised us with a gift basket: a couple of shirts from the local state park; mountain dew (which was invented there); some paraphernalia from the B&B; and her yummy scones for the drive.  The scones are almost gone, of course.  Devoured.

Ok, I have procrastinated long enough.  Time to get back on the road.  See you in Denver!

On Our Way

We are hitting the road, America! 

The end of the world as we know it

{but I feel fine}

Today is my last day of work (here) before the long drive to Denver and the new start.  And I'm ready.  Really, really ready.  Yesterday traffic was horrific on my way in, and I just turned up the music, smiled to myself and marveled at all the poor schmucks around me who have to do this the rest of the week.  And the week after that.  And the week after that.

Bye bye, commute!  You suck, BTW!

Earlier this week I said goodbye to a few coworkers who will not be in the office today.  Some people ask me if I'm sad and I give them the politically correct answer about new beginnings and opportunities, etc.  The fact is, no, I'm not sad.  And no, I will not miss this area.  It's not so much that something is wrong with this area (besides traffic!) as it is a general I-just-don't-fit-in-here experience.

So I packed my car to the gills last night, channeling my old college self.

We have decided to leave Orca here with G, until he joins me there permanently.  Not only is she old, but we just found out that she has bone cancer, and it is best to have her near her vet as long as possible before switching things up.  Overall, you know that we are sad and this is not good news for us.  It was literally a welcome-back-from-Africa slap in the face.  But.  Every other bad health issue we have experienced with rabbits has ended tragically and suddenly within about 24 hours, and this is one of those things that will be manageable for the next few months.  And Orca is not in pain; we make sure of that.  So.

Also, remember our downsizing efforts of late?  How we have managed to get rid of like 45% of what we own in this moving process?  Yeah, I thought of that as I bought souvenirs in Africa.  How very ironic it is to undergo the cleansing effect of purging so much crap, only to buy more crap stuff on vacation.  Actually, it's nice stuff.  And also?  I keep thinking of things that are packed in boxes that I am immediately going to take to goodwill once I unpack them in CO, so it's all good.

I got bangs, thank you Jesus.  I look like a human again, sort of.

P.S. I would have looked more human in this pic if I had makeup on.  And if I could lose about 40 pounds.  I'm just sayin.  Do me a favor and imagine me looking a lot better in real life.  We'll just go with that.

A few days ago I visited the doctor for a last check-up before the move.  She said that she has known a few clients who moved from here to Denver, and absolutely love it there.  And then she has a few clients who moved from Denver to here and are having a hard time.  I was like, stick me in that first category, sister!

We are on the cusp of a big change.  Although I know that when I settle in Denver, real life will kick in and I will have problems, it is very hard to imagine at this point.  It is all romanticism and idealism and westward expansion at this point.

Problems?  Those are staying behind in Virginia!  Life is going to be nothing but sunshine and butterflies now!

Livingstone, I presume

A more upbeat story about Zimbabwe:

Victoria Falls owes its reputation as one of the seven natural wonders of the world to a British missionary doctor named David Livingstone.

Finding himself in Africa doing missions and medical work for the mother country, he wrote prolifically and his letters spread like wildfire through England.  He said that Africa was a beautiful and lush country, filled with industrious people.  He said that it was not a dark and lost continent.  Africans credit Livingstone with helping their countries' reputation and spreading good news to the "civilized" world.  The beginnings of marketing, if you will.

Then Livingstone contracted malaria and was unable to keep up with his writings.  News from Africa stopped and Queen Victoria became so concerned that she asked her country, who would go look for him?  Who would venture into this new world to help find him or, God forbid, bring his remains back home?

A man by the name of Henry Morton Stanley volunteered to go, and it took him over a year to find Livingstone.  He would travel from tribe to tribe, and unable to speak the language(s), he would blunder his way through communications, trying to make his point.

At last, he came to a tribe and saw a man in the distance.  This man was shaggy, extremely gaunt and unkempt.  Stanley put his hand to his eyes to block the sun and shouted, "Livingstone, I presume?"

 

Livingstone was (and still is) beloved by the Africans.  Before he became sick, as he would travel through the continent, he would denounce the slave practices that were occurring within tribes even though slavery was supposedly outlawed.  Quoting scripture and preaching God's love, he would defend human dignity and repeat endlessly that slavery was a sin against creation, against how we are meant to relate to one another and live together.

At one point, out of desperation, he "bought" two African slaves simply in order to free them.  As he turned to walk away, they followed him, asking if they could work for him.  They said they would be willing to do anything at all for him.  He turned and said, "I do not need workers.  I need friends."  So they became his friends and traveled with him until the end.  After he died, they carried his body across the continent until they were able to find a boat that would take his remains back to his home land.

Livingstone is remembered (as I think all missionaries should be) for his love.  He deeply loved Africa and its people.  He named the falls "Victoria Falls" not only to honor his queen but also in the hopes of making the area more relate-able, more approachable, for the rest of the world.  In his mind, Africa was a place to be visited, appreciated, explored.

We agree.

The Front Room

After flying for 16 hours to Joburg, we were on a quick 2-hr hop to Cape Town, seated next to a South African lady.  She was clearly very professional and clearly knew that we were tourists, restless from hours of travel and itching to start our vacation.

As I picked through my fresh fruit and salad (unable to actually eat any of it), G struck up a conversation with her and she wanted to know where we were going to visit.  When we told her we were starting with Cape Town, she nodded, told us what a beautiful city it is, and then said rather nonchalantly, "You know, Cape Town is not very representative of Africa.  The rest of the continent is so...different."

Cape Town view from the base of Table Mountain

A stunning view on our drive around the Cape

After a few days here and a few days on safari, we were wondering what was in store for us in Zimbabwe.  We expected to be impressed by Victoria Falls, and we were.  Keep in mind, these pics are from the dry season.

On one of our last nights in Zimbabwe, our van driver was asking about our trip, and after we gave him our Cape Town/safari overview, he nodded and said very politely and cheerfully, "Ahhh, I see!  You have seen Africa's Front Room, eh?  Now in Zimbabwe, we show you the Back Room."

He wasn't kidding.  Zimbabwe is one of the poorest countries in the world, and I think it is accurate to say that we have seen the very best part of it, and even that was...eye opening.

On the drive from the airport to our (secluded - isolated by an electric fence) hotel, we saw police officers in full uniform, complete with weapons, hitch hiking on the side of the road because they had no vehicles.  People walked along the road, layed down almost indiscriminately, leaned against trees, swatted at flies and at children...

In preparing for the trip, we read country summaries provided by our travel agency and they mentioned the fall of the Zimbabwe financial market in 2009.  I knew it was bad, but I have such a limited concept of economics that I almost had no frame of reference.  They experienced a five billion percent inflation.  Billion.

One of our local tour guides was willing to answer some of our questions about it and he said that overnight, he lost his entire life savings.  Poof.  Because of the inflation of currency, he was considered a quintillionaire, and the computers simply would not register all the zeroes involved in how much money he owned, so the bank just gave up and his money was gone.  Not only did he have to start over from scratch (along with the rest of his countrymen), but he started off in debt because the bank converted all mortgages, loans and other debts into U.S. currency.  It just didn't bother to convert anyone's money along with it.

In all honesty, Zimbabwe was a good place to finish up our trip because it was an easy place to leave.  Peddlers surrounded you as soon as you left the hotel grounds, trying to sell $50 Billion dollar bills of their currency because it is so worthless.  Some stores sold coffee mugs with decoupaged $20 Billion dollar bills on them for decoration.  It was mind boggling.

We were not entirely sure if it was safe to walk around town, but our tour guide told us that he could guarantee that although the peddlers would hassle us, they would not touch us or try to steal our stuff.  He actually said, "Oh, stealing from you would be their death sentence."  He then explained that the country is so desperate for the money brought by tourism, that stealing will land people in jail.  And jail is likely to get them killed.  A jail cell designed to hold 20 people is more likely to fit 60 or more, and if a person spends more than 3 months in jail, their chances of dying from disease increase exponentially.

I realize this is a buzzkill compared to our other posts, and yet I have to include this.  If I left it out, I wouldn't be giving you the full picture.  This move has pushed my limits and I found myself, even half a world away, mentally calculating expenses and stressing about money coming and going over the next few months.  So, that said, Zimbabwe really put things into perspective for me.  Not just about finances, but about things like literacy and access to clean water and real medicine.  To fruits and vegetables that are safe to eat.  A space like this blog to express myself and my experiences.  The ability to own pets and actually have the resources at hand to take care of them.

More Africa stuff to come.

Remember me with good hair

This is my last weekend in VA and true to form, it is packed.  Today I'm getting my hair done (for the last time with my hairdresser of SEVEN YEARS!) but before that, I'm saying goodbye to a friend. 

Unfortunately, during my last meeting with my friend, my hair is going to look awful.  A few months back I decided to grow out my bangs and it's just not working out.  I miss them terribly.

I spent the entire African vacation looking like this:

or this:

The entire point of my decision to grow out my bangs was so that they would cascade alluringly down the side of my face, making me look soft and seductive.

I'll give you a minute to stop snorting.

Needless to say I always yank them back into a bobby pin and pine over my long lost bangs, so today, I'm getting them back.

So as I say goodbye, I'm gonna be like, When you remember me, remember me with good hair!

{This is what they like to call a first world problem.  I know.}

TGIF, people!

Random Africa Facts

Ten things we learned about Africa while we were there, in no particular order:

1.  Zimbabwe has 350 (!) different breeds of mosquito, but only one carries malaria.

2.  The Cape of Good Hope was originally called "Cabos das Tormentas", or "Cape of Storms", by Bartolomeu Dias, the first European to sail around it (apparently he had a pretty rough voyage).  Dias returned to his native Portugal and recounted his tale to the King, who declared that it should be called the Cape of Good Hope, as it was seen as a good sign that a trade route could be opened to lands farther east.

3.  Game animals--kudu, impala, nyala, wildebeest, etc--only sleep for 10-15 minutes at a stretch.  Day and night mean nothing to them; their lives consist of eating, procreating, sleeping for very brief periods, and trying not to get eaten.

4.  Lions--because they are apex predators--sleep for 20-21 hours per day.

5.  Cape Town looks like a European city.

6.  If you collected the water that flows over Victoria Falls during the wet season--about 1.7 million gallons a minute--for three days, you could supply New York City with fresh water for a year.

7.  Elephants' stomachs can only process about 60% of what they eat, which is why they have to eat so much to stay healthy.

8.  Cheetahs don't have collar bones, which gives them a very long stride while running.

9.  The zebra's closest structural relative is the rhinoceros.  Go figure.

10.  Giraffes--for all their size--can be nearly invisible when standing next to a tree.

The very best pic

This morning I slept in until 4:30.
That would be A.M.

I am no longer feeling any effects of jet lag (or of the meds from the trip) except the sleep issue; I stay awake just fine during the day, even at work.  And I crash around 10:00 p.m.  Sure enough, I'm awake by 4:30 every morning.

If I could just sustain this level of energy, I would be a very productive person.  I give it until Thursday and I'll be dragging myself out of bed around 6:00.

So I'll just blog since I've been dying to show you the best picture ever.

Here it is:

That cage?  G IS IN IT.

I'm waiting for National Geographic to call and offer me a job.

Sooooo, the Great White Sharks.  The shark cage was one of the first things we did in South Africa, located about 2 hours from Capetown.

These are the winter months in South Africa (actually, while we were there, they began the spring season) and the water is very cold.  All people getting into the cage must wear a 7 mm wet suit.  As it happens, I decided to opt out of the cage.  Believe it or not, I didn't decide this out of fear, but more out of practicality.  I was expecting the water to be murky, and it really was.  I didn't want to wrestle myself into a wet suit and endure the freezing water just to get a view of one tooth or something.

So, I had a come to Jesus moment and decided, that's it, I'm out.

And I'm very, very glad I made that decision.  I was able to go to the top of the little boat, have a seat, keep my balance through the wild swells, and snap away.

The cage is attached to the boat and five adults go in at one time.

G's view from inside the cage.

Here are some pics from the boat:

The Jaws references abounded.  Hollywood has no borders.  The small boat held about twenty tourists and they were from all over.  There was a handful of Americans, some Brits, some Germans, and some others.  Language barrier?  What language barrier?  People were like, WE'RE GONNA NEED A BIGGER BOAT.

Compared to sharks we have seen before in Hawaii, Great Whites are much different.  Obviously they are bigger.  The ones we saw ranged anywhere from 8 feet to about 15 feet.  I would say that most of them fell within the 12 foot range.

I asked the boat captain about their size and he said that they range from like 2-4 meters.  Which means nothing to me.  I was like, you guys and your metric system.  Feet!  How long are they in feet?!  I'm sure they love Americans.

He said that these were the, and I quote, "Little Guys."

Other types of sharks we have seen will sort of linger around the boat and the cage.  They are not fed and they are not baited; but sharks are curious and have incredible senses, so if you make a lot of noise and throw some yummy fish bits in the water, they'll come check it out.

Great Whites, though, don't stay around for long.  Perhaps five to seven seconds, tops?  That's why my claim-to-fame picture is so miraculous; it's so hard to tell from these still shots how quickly the sharks were moving.  I would hold the camera in front of my chin and not even bother to look through the peephole; I would watch the shark so I could enjoy it and basically shoot pics as fast as I could at random.

For all of our jokes about being crazy to get in the cage (G) or wanting to see them up close, they really are marvelous.  They are the perfect killing machine and efficient in every way.  Their design and their capabilities amaze me and I'm so, so glad we were able to experience them up close.

In trying to attract sharks to the boat, I figure it is smart to do exactly the opposite if you ever find yourself in the water and want to avoid them.  Basically, don't bleed.  Don't make abrupt splashes or movements.  Stay quiet and stay still.

We're gonna need a bigger boat.